Are you going bananas yet?

is for asking people what’s for homework

is there for stalking celebrities

is for listening to music

and tumblr is my life.

YouTube is more than that to me, it almost tops with tumblr but the rest is pretty much legit

tyleroakley:

This is a letter I wrote for Patrick Stump the day after he posted this: http://www.patrickstump.com/post/18474641989/we-liked-you-better-fat-confessions-of-a-pariah. Is very long, but I put a lot of effort on it and took me a hell of a work to translate it. So here it is, to Patrick (if this gets the opportunity) and to anyone else who wants to read this and know about “musical influences in my life” so to speak, because this letter aims more than just that.

Before I begin, I’d like to make clear a few things. First, I don’t know if you’ll be reading this or not between the other thousands and thousands that you receive but I wish you do, even though I don’t seem worthy of your time; I’m just a simple music worshiper and admirer of those who provide me. Second, if for any reason you find something offensive in my words, that’s not my intention, my only purpose with this is to return a little of what you’ve done unconsciously for me (and others) an endless number of times; I tried to be as polite as possible, if I failed I offer my apologies. Third, I don’t know you personally and you know me less, I’m aware of that fact, therefore if I assume something about you below that isn’t true, I accept my error and I take it back, but please don’t misunderstand it. And last, I didn’t mean to extend so much but it went like this because it was what I felt was necessary to let you know if you decided to read this; my only hope is that even a small part of this letter will cheer you up or, at least, will be useful.

Formosa, Argentina, February 29^th 2012

Subject: response to “WE LIKED YOU BETTER FAT: CONFESSIONS OF A PARIAH” post and related to “THE CURE TO GROWING OLDER – A MUSICAL RETROSPECTIVE”.

To Patrick Stump

I’m writing you passed around 12 hours since your last notification on the Internet. I was about to go to sleep when I entered Twitter for a last check and my eyes startled with your name. Rapidly I absorbed what you wanted or tried to express in that post and without thinking I headed directly to Jacob Tender’s article, which I must say that was superbly presented (concrete but simple). I’d like to clarify that during the reading of both I passed through a constant change of emotions (indignation, surprise, depression, disgust…) but after assimilating, I felt the necessity of making this “letter”. I will attempt not to extend too much but lamentably, if it helps, I set an introduction about my musical preferences since little and I should warn you that what you’re about to read may resemble a little to Jacob’s (expressed in that way it made it easier for me and, as I said, I expect for you too).

I know my words aren’t that reflexive or thoughtful but maybe you can take the most out of them. And if you’re reading this already, thank you.

As a kid I started to be musically influenced by my older brother and I have to acknowledge that it was good: Blink-182 and Green Day, generally. I really didn’t understand the meaning or the reason of “listen music” then; probably told him that I liked them every time he showed me a song because they were catchy, or so that I’d be left alone at other times.

I also got to metion the band that really influenced my early years in music and, I’m not going to lie it wasn’t Fall Out Boy, it was My Chemical Romance; which I received with open arms into my life and music taste thanks to my sister. That’s when I began to take music “seriously”, like there was something more behind it. Shortly after, I don’t remember if I had watched it on Mtv or if I just overheard my brother listened to that melody before but until today it’s stuck in my memory the beginning of the Sugar We’re Going Down video. Spite they were only a couple of bands that I often listen to, they were enough for me. And then, before I have noticed, Fall Out Boy became my band (in a way of speaking).

It was an arduous course but I enjoyed every moment: I downloaded all the albums (yeah, that’s how we do it here, sorry) and –the ones I could- bought them, listen and savored every song, I memorized all the lyrics -learning english in the process-, I saw every video and interviews, and I always wanted more. I’ve never consider myself the best fan or something like that, even now at my 17 years I still don’t understand many of the songs and their meanings; I suppose that I haven’t “lived” enough yet to do it, but with the time and my dedication I proved myself wrong.

When Jacob spoke about what From Under the Cork Tree meant to him and explained the Take This To Your Grave-thing, it also let me thinking about the other albums. For me all of them were and are unique, unrepeatable; each one has a special mark with which I differentiate them, and I wouln’t trade them for anything. I never compared them as “better than the other” just because the sound, style, or any other thing that didn’t fit on the expectations; in fact, because of these reasons I enjoyed every single one better. And it may sound ridiculous, but I hope to take them to my grave (literally).

Respect to what you said about Folie à Deux being your “poorest selling major label album”, amazed me a little. When I bought it on a vacation in Brazil I stayed stunned with the bizarreness that had result and even so, in that strange way left me speechless due to the outstanding complexity of it but deep inside, pitifully, I sensed it wouldn’t be considered as such (perhaps it wasn’t the indicated time but I can’t ensure that).

After the FàD phase I remember have heard by international media the “break-up” of the band, which I had considered innocently as the simple recess or time-out that all the artists usually do upon releasing new material. Nevertheless when I listened the word hiatus for the first time a lot of things started to change; and I must tell you Patrick, nobody likes change. Change, whatever it is, is hard to comprehend and therefore takes time to accept it, I speak this from experience and not only personally or about music. When looking for the meaning of the word in Google, I was not happy; rather with a broken heart and a bit wounded by naive justifications.

With the passing days I found out about more news, new proyects, new albums. For my part I also became one of those “haters” like you were reffering or, as Jacob said those “ignorant semi-listeners”, and ocasionally I had the audacity to refer severly toward the persons I had in mind for such a long time. Just for being ignorant I went through that phase, blinded by an unjustifiable anger, and then I just decided to drop into oblivion.

However, I kept rummaging about each one and, in the last years, what caught my attention were your ideas for Soul Punk. I really didn’t want to know anything about it, was afraid to listen something I wouldn’t like, feel disappointed or so. But my first real interaction related to any of your projects I believe was when I saw the launching video of Spotlight (Oh, Nostalgia), and as I finished it I realized that that song –at least to me- screamed your name and, months later, when I saw the style of the whole record I knew it yelled your full musical essence. I still felt confused about it and still somewhat suspicious, although things became clear to me after seeing a video of The Damn Things: I really liked what I had in front of me.

And here is where my full acceptance of the change that represented the word hiatus entered in picture. After seeing and hearing the video of This City there was no more to say. Personally I felt ashamed of having turned against, criticizing the four people who most inspired me in every way (musical, human, artistic); foolishly thinking that the fans suffered betrayal (including me) when in fact the betrayal would be seen from the other side of the stage.

Then, to renew myself, I began (once again) to delight me with the old songs you composed, making me bring back all the moments -both joyful and the difficult ones- you helped me go through and wich I “shared” with FOB, in a manner of speaking. During that time of comparison between before and after I found the opposite of the disappointment that I so much feared; I could only find myself with a great feeling of pride for “my boys” and a bit of nostalgia too, for how fast the years went by, somehow seeing you guys grow in many ways.

To finish this “FOB-hiatus” theme and leave things straight I wanna say I’m proud and so happy for you, all four, together or not; I understood that those feelings should be directed to the particular person, not a band, an album or a song, but to who is behind this, putting body and soul to do what enjoys and shares with others who, at the same time, may feel identified. Those who really changed lives were Andy, Pete, Joe and you; as persons you contributed a lot and endured the same way. And when assimilating this, it hurts to see, obviously not only for myself or some fans, how much hatred is directed at all of you and, I’m not sure if it is so but what it seems, mainly to you lately.

With the knowledge of the emergence of the “we liked you better fat” group I was disgusted with the humanity (from the fans). I couldn’t believe people could fall that low. And as I read your relation about the threatening letters to your home, the kids that paid for tickets to shows just to tell you horrible things and others, I couldn’t stand it; and cannot even imagine what it must have been for you.

Regarding the matter of you letting people down, for me and many, is all the contrary. As anyone you have the right to do what you like the most, no matter what others think. For good I know that what you do does not disappoint any of your family, none of your friends, and none of your fans by far. And I’m sure that people who really wish and want the best for you exceeds in number to the handful of rude persons-attempts who you did no harm at all. I’m not saying that being a “smaller” group makes the hate less, but they can’t compare with all the support I saw, that you’re receiving everywhere. Everyday I see many people, also very dedicated, that strives to pay tribute for the good and talented person you are. I think you wouldn’t accept these kind of compliments but you’d be being modest and I have no idea how many times people or fans have said this to you already, however  I’ll do it again because I know you deserve it: you really are an admirable  and very talented person  in many aspects.

What you did together and /or separated, for me is something invaluable from what I took and I will continue taking inspiration and enjoyment. Because after so many years music itself defined the person I am today, since it became a very important part of my life even though I can not fully perceive it; but also thanks to you, in some sense, I am what I am and because of that I am very grateful and in debt with you.

I wrote this letter with humble and sincere words to express some of my support to you and others that are receiving so much senseless suffering, and if you were interested to know “briefly” what your music meant and means to me. Also, to comfort in some way, even a little, but that more than anything is the purpose for which I wrote this. I hope I’ve achieved it.

Patrick, I know that sounds like a film line but, don’t lose your hope in anything you do or believe in and don’t give up on you. I probably don’t know what I’m talking about but I only wish the best for you and although I don’t even know you, you are an important person to me, as for many others,  and I just pretend making you feel better or backed on.

I regrettably don’t remember the exact words from this gifted artist but he once said he will keep releasing new music for the love and sake of it no matter the rest, if people liked it then they’d embrace it, but if they didn’t it would be a shame/lost for them, and he could care less for the last ones.

And with my last words I leave: I’ll never lose hope in you as I’ll never lose hope in music. I’d like to say “Belivers never die”, but I prefer “Our beliefs will live forever”. It may seem that those phrases are the same (in other words) but if you look closely they’re not.

Julieta S. Lazzarini